The last few days I’ve been trying to get all the paperwork together for us to get married on the 8th of August 2008. The number 8/8/8 is auspicious in Chinese culture and makes my future mother-in-law very happy. We wanted to registrar our intention as soon as possible because we expect a lot of other people wanted to marry on that date as well. 

I just wanted to post a note about how to go about getting married in the UK to a non British citizen so that other couples can find some useful information:

First you must apply to the Home Office for a Certificate of Approval (COA) This costs 299 pounds and takes between 20-70 days to process. We received ours last week and we applied first week of May so it took us 7 weeks (49 days) The certificate said that the permission was granted on 30 May so I was suprised it took another month for the Home Office to mail it from Croydon to London. In addition, I was very upset that the papers came back crushed. It seemed like someone had crushed our certificate by mistake, throw it in the bin and then sent it to us! For someone working at the Home office, it may not be a big deal but I’m quite upset that someone would treat something that important in such a demeaning manner. And for goodness sake, we’ve paid 300 pounds for that piece of paper! I spent 10 minutes ironing it out again because I was too embarrased to hand it into the Registrar’s Office in that condition. 

After receiving the COA, you can take it to any registrar’s office to register your intention to get married. I went to the Southwark Registrar’s office because this is the borough we are living at. I think some couples get married at the Chelsea Registrar’s office as it is supposed to be very beautiful but I didnt want any complications with immigrations. I’m at the mercy of the Home Office again when I ask for permission to remain in the country as a spouse so I didnt want to have my marriage void because I registered at the wrong office. 

Southwark Registrar’s office opens at 9.30 but they only see the first 5 couples. We arrived at 8.45 and there were already 4 couples before us. It is advisable to arrive earlier. We are seated inside the Registrar’s office and called one by one. Take a book or magazine to read because there is an awful amount of waiting. 

At the Registrar’s office, you must submit your COA and pay the fee. It is cheaper to get married during the week but as we are registering on a friday, it was 100 pounds more expensive. Getting the Registrar to come to your wedding venue would set you back 300 pounds. You have to pay 30 pounds per person for the permission and then 135 pounds for getting married on the friday. You have to give your intention to get married atleast 15 days before your proposed wedding date.  

After another hour’s wait, you are seen by the Registrar herself. Ours was very warm and friendly. She told us about the underage couple who were in the line before us. They insisted on registering their intention that day rather than waiting an extra month when they would both be 18 to get married. She had asked the mother why the son could not wait another month to get married as underage candidates require more complicated documentation. The mother had said that the son didnt want to. At that point, our Registrar had asked her “Who is the parent in this relationship?” Our Registrar had some other funny stories about sham marriages, there was once a woman who did not know anything about her alleged fiance - not even his last name or address. When the Registrar refused to give her permission, that woman came the next week with a different hairstyle, only to find that the Registrar remembered her special circumstances. 

Our Registrar is also getting married next year so she asked about my wedding dress. I told her that the one I liked (the Vera Wang V shaped “3 roses” dress) only came in Size 2. She said she was trying to squeeze into a size 16 herself so she couldnt imagine how I would need lose weight for my wedding dress. I said that I was tempted to get a dressmaker to make one similar but she said that once you have seen the original, you will never be happy with a dress maker making it. Its very interesting to see how women bond over wedding details!

Anyways, the Registrar takes down some of our personal details, makes us confirm that details are accurate, has a short chat about our wedding and shows us the venue where we will be signing. We will be getting married in the Garden Room, which is quite nice. I’m getting one of my family friends to sign on behalf of my parents and my fiance’s sister or mum might sign on behalf of his family. 

I’m attaching pictures of the Garden Room:

UPDATE: Also just found out that you can get your ceremony broadcast on the internet for family and friends. Im definately going to do that for my mum and dad to see all the way from India.